Since it's Sunday, I thought I'd better blog about something religious so I can count this blogging time as an appropriate Sunday activity. Here you go. Today I'm going to talk about pride. Now pride is something that the prophets are always talking about--mainly, about us needing to get rid of it. Yeah, yeah, easier said than done. But I have come upon a method that will completely strip you of all pride. 100% guaranteed. I call it "The Pride-Sucker Method."So this is it: Volunteer to do anything that you do not have the skills for. Then show up, perform agreed-upon duties and leave 100% pride-free. Here's my particular favorite: If the choir assistant is short a pianist for that evening's choir practice, agree to do it. But I don't play the piano, you say. Well, that does not matter. Even if you play the piano this method will still work.
Testimonial: I, Kasey, used The Pride-Sucker Method today and I can definitely bear testimony that this method works! I was pulled out of Sunday School today and asked if I could play for choir tonight. Of course I said yes because I knew about The Pride-Sucker Method and thought it would be a fantastic opportunity to rid myself of some of that pride baggage.
I showed up and looked at the music for the first time. Love that no preparation stuff! Then I met the choir director who happened to be perhaps the most qualified choir director I've ever met, working on a master's degree in some sort of music specialty. Oh goody. I knew I was going to get lots of pride sucked out today. And I did. The Pride-Sucker Method really came through for me. I did my duties with my usual Kasey excellence of forgetting how to count and mixing up my pages and playing the men's notes on the treble clef and struggling through music note dsylexia because of those extra lines of music and playing wrong notes and all sorts of heinous errors that are too numerous to mention. Oh and that was all just without even attempting the accompaniment. I was really on a roll tonight.
The thing to remember about this method is to completely let your pride go and just flow with it. Pride, self-respect....let them go. It's difficult, but you have to hang in there through every last humiliating moment. I confess that during a moment of weakness tonight, I started wishing I had worn a bag over my head and introduced myself as Mystery Sister on the piano. But that would have impeded The Pride-Sucker Method. I should be saying thank goodness I had no paper bag to hide my face. It made the humiliation all the more acute. So thank you Pride-Sucker Method. I feel completely stripped of pride.
Well, at least for tonight.
I'm sure next week I'm going to blame this all on my friend Katie. "No, no that wasn't me playing the piano in choir. You're thinking of Katie. She's a brunette too and since we work together in Relief Society and have names that start with K and end with an 'e' sound, people seem to mix us up from time to time. "
9 comments:
Kasey--that is so, so funny! I am NOT laughing at you, either, I am laughing with you!! :) I am SURE you played your very best and way to step up and volunteer!! I love this clever method of ridding yourself of all pride, by the way, as I have experienced it many many many times before (although never wiht a piano, but with my mouth, etc) without ever knowing what it was. Thank you for making me laugh today...
Also--I LOVE the melting pot...Ladies Night anyone?
You should totally blame Katie. I love that idea. Glad you got rid of some pride.;) I can only imagine how it went. Sam told me the director is an opera coach. Wow! Hope he has a sense of humor!
that is hilarious. at least you were brave enough to say yes. :)
Kasey, I feel your pain. I don't even think I can explain just how much I really do feel your pain. This happened to me just recently. I have zero pride left when it comes to the piano. Yet I still get suckered into doing it. Just say no. That is my new motto. Just say no and walk away. And don't ever let that very capable choir director get you down. I'm pretty sure I know who it is, and she thinks she's a lot better than she actually is. I promise.
kasey...I actually have telepathic skills, and during your choir practice I got several messages from the choir members who said, "oh my heavens, this woman is second to none...well, maybe Mozart was better. But, really, she is sight-reading and her fingers are gracefully moving all-over the keys in such a sexy fluid and continuous movement!" (don't worry, it was a man thinking these thoughts!) And one of the sopranos was thinking "Oh my-lanta! She just played a...let's see...every good boy...a B, and then a, FACE, that would be an E, and then a...Oh what the heck! I can't even tell the names of the notes let alone where they are on the piano! Heck! I stumble over Mary had a little lamb! I only wish that I could play as well as the beautiful Miss Kasey!"
I was actually flooded with these sort of comments for about an hour (some of them were actually R rated, from the men in the choir. So, if I were you, I would try to look a little less beautiful and be a little less talented during the next rehearsal!)
Love ya! LEna
Lena, you are naughty--but your comment made me laugh! I agree with you, too--Kasey is one hot momma!
Kasey, I would also like to testify that the Pride-Sucker method is true. I have volunteered to conduct the music without knowing how and have left with no pride. The good news for me is that my entire ward is about the size of your choir. :) Plus, only the old ladies ever look up at me, and our piano player also practices the Pride-Sucker method, so we evenly distribute the humility amongst ourselves...
Autumn
I was there that day, Kasey, and you did a perfect job. I didn't notice anything wrong at all. Maybe you're just wishing for a Pride-Sucker moment. hehe. :-) But I thought it was perfect. And, if it helps, I thought the director guy was not being clear in his instructions to you or any of us. So, please don't feel bad or anything, you did wonderfully! And, Naomi, the leader was a man, so I'm guessing it's not the "she" you think it is.
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