Jesus Wants Me for a Sunbeams Teacher

I was just released a couple of weeks ago as a family history consultant and called as a Primary worker, specifically the Sunbeams teacher.

It's fun to be back in Primary. I've done everything in the presidency but I've never been a Primary teacher. I'm excited for the opportunity. I think you really get a unique chance to connect with the kids when you're their teacher. I'm also so happy and relieved not to have been called as the choir pianist, which happens to be on my never, ever or I may have to go inactive list.

There are 8 Sunbeams that are likely to show on any given Sunday. My first two weeks I had 4 in my class, 2 boys, 2 girls. It was quite fun and easy. We had snacks. We went for a walk in our Sunbeam choo-choo-train formation and got lots of drinks at the water fountain. We did wiggle songs. We had a lesson and craft.

This Sunday was different.

There were 7 Sunbeams today, 5 of them boys. Here's a little visual for you of my class today:

Ok, I wasn't wacking the kids. But it did feel remarkably like a game of wac-a-mole.

I separated J1 and W from their wrestlemania tournament on the floor only to find that E is crawling underneath chairs.

J2 is pilfering through my bag.

C is having a spitting contest with J1 now.

W is on the run again.

S is sitting quietly in her chair.

K is giggling and running around.

E and J1 and J2 and W and C are going five different directions.

And now for the lesson. Oh wait. W and J1 think it's wrestlemania time again.

Did I mention the walk to the drinking fountain that ended in a 100-yard free-for-all dash to tag the Primary room door and then roll around on the floor?

I even had a parent in there with me. It's not like I wasn't prepared either. I had a schedule that included snacks, a walk, fun songs, a lesson with lots of visuals, coloring, etc. But I might as well have been talking to the ceiling or maybe just S. I think she was the only one who listened or sat for more than 15 seconds straight.

I felt completely incompetent. I thought about doing the 100-yard dash out the door myself. What happened to those cushy days in Relief Society, playing around on my iPhone? I never quite appreciated the boredom as I should have.

I'm determined to get this right. Any helpful hints out there that don't include tying them to their seats or letting them tie me up and swing from the chandelier?

My Latest Obsession

Since we've been in our new house, MJ bought a television. You would think that after TV fasting for six or something years that I would be so above watching TV, preferring to shun it for more intellectual and useful employments of my time.

This is what I have to say about TV now. I love TV. I love that when I make dinner and my kids are screaming at me and trying to sneak food from the pantry and pulling at my pants, I can turn on the magic button and there is silence and happiness for all.

And the next thing I love about TV is DVR. Love love you DVR!

DVR has made possible my latest TV show obsession: Design on a Dime. I know I'm probably late to the party in expressing my love for this show but better late than never, as they say. The premise of this show is that a design team of three takes a room in someone's house and completely redecorates it for $1000 or less. They almost always pull out the heavy tools to create new furniture or art or accessories. I love the creativity they have and the way they take ordinary materials or thrift store/garage sale finds and make them amazing.

The boys get to watch this with me a lot. I think they like it. I can't even turn on the TV now without Evan asking, "Mom, are you going to watch Design on the Dime?" Even Isaiah will chill with me and watch what the crew comes up with.

MJ is afraid I'm making them gay. I'm just well rounding them.

This show is going to help me take it to a whole new level. I've finally worn MJ down. He didn't blink an eye when he came home to find I'd been using some of his saws. He even offered, without grumbling or possessiveness, to show me how to use the router. It was amazing.

I have lots of projects lined up now, which really isn't good because it's not like I don't have 27 other things I should be doing instead. And since it's my modus operandi to take anything I get obsessed with to the maximum limit, I'm probably going to be neglectful of everything else in my life for a while.

Emails and phone calls will go unanswered. My kids might not get baths for a week. Cereal might be served for dinner. If I don't blog for a loooong time, please understand.

Why Melinda Will Never Ask Me to Babysit Again

A while ago my sister-in-law and her husband went on vacation and I got to babysit my cute little niece Ava. Ava loved Emma--and especially Emma's room. Ava loved Evan and how fun he was to play with. Ava loved me and followed me around calling me Mama because she couldn't say Aunt Kasey. And Ava loved Uncle Michael more than all of us because...well, I don't really know why. But to her he might as well be Santa Claus.

There was one person in the house who Ava did not love. There was one person who I must admit, was not very nice. One person in our house had his own secret weapon for striking terror into his older cousin's heart. Let me just put it this way: When Melinda later asked Ava about her stay at Aunt Kasey's, she had this to say, "Zee-ah bite. Zee-ah bite."

Yes, it is true. I had to dive in numerous times to prevent my little jaws from setting his chomping mouth onto his cousin. While I believe I saved her 99% of the time from actual infliction, she did go home with teeth marks. Whether it was Zay or his younger-cousin Peter, with whom Ava also stayed, is not known. It is most likely though that the culprit lives in my house.

Each time I would discipline the little turkey, he would do this chomping jaws thing with a naughty smile on his face. I was sooo not happy with him, but at the same time it was just a little bit funny. He knew he was being bad and he was showing me exactly how he was terrorizing poor Ava.

After Ava left, we tried to see if we could catch Mr. Jaws on camera.

According to the nursery leaders, Isaiah is an angel at Church and never ever bites anyone. I guess he saves it up--or the threat of it--to harass his cousin.

It's Always Fun When Grandpa Comes

Back in October Michael had to go to Utah to conduct some business. We thought it would be fun for him to take Evan along for some one-on-one time and to visit the grandparents. Since Evan doesn't attend school yet, it was the perfect opportunity.

We told Evan that we had an early birthday present for him. He would get to go to Utah, just him and Daddy.

His response was lukewarm. Where was the jumping up and down? The hoorays? Nada. This sure wasn't what we were expecting. So we tried it another way. "Evan, you'll get to go with Daddy to a BYU game!" And still he was just so-so. He said he'd rather have a rocket. BYU? Utah? Yawn.

Then we spun it this way, "Evan, you'll get to go see Grandpa!"

All of sudden, a smile broke out on his face and he was the most excited boy ever. He couldn't wait, for Grandpas are better than rockets or BYU or airplane trips.

The kids have such a fun time with Grandpa. He just loves to play with them and take them places and spoil them rotten. He'll call them several times a week just to talk to them. He'll send them packages from time to time. We flew him out this summer and they had him busy from sunup to sundown. Then he even came out a second time, making the long drive from Utah. It's no wonder Evan was so excited to see his Grandpa.